


I Could be Happy Without You

by DeadlyBingo



Series: Totally Platonic Roommates [2]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M, Hiatus fic, Post 4x23 fic, olicity - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-26
Updated: 2016-05-26
Packaged: 2018-07-10 10:42:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6981079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeadlyBingo/pseuds/DeadlyBingo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Damien Darhk’s downfall, the loss of their team, and the destruction of their bunker, Felicity invites Oliver to stay in the 2nd bedroom at the loft.  For weeks they live as happily platonic roommates, rediscovering a friendship that they had both feared was lost.  But eventually, they have to question if where they are now is really what’s best for them in the future. (Series of one-shots based during the 4-5 hiatus).</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Could be Happy Without You

“ _Felicity_ _Megan_ _Smoak_.” Oliver’s voice carried through the loft with an urgency that had Felicity rushing down from her bedroom, heels and purse already in hand, as her brain began calculating the fastest way to get to the bunker during peak traffic hours.

As she landed in the living room, Felicity’s eyes scanned for immediate danger before finding Oliver at the kitchen island, his face serious as he squared his shoulders and spread his hands palm down on the granite.

“Do we need to head to the bunker?” Felicity questioned, more tired from her long day than nervous about a potential mission.  “We _just_ got back from work, can’t the bad guys give us an hour for dinner before causing havoc?”

Oliver shook his head no before motioning over his shoulder and questioning, “Why is _every_ _single_ cereal box left open on the counter?”

A smile tugged at Felicity’s lips as she realized there was no danger beyond Oliver’s obsession with keeping a perfect kitchen.  Even when they were dating, she could be as messy as she wanted in any other part of their home, but leave one coffee spoon out beside the coffee pot, and Oliver was sure to sense it and appear moments later, already in cleaning mode.

“I was running late for work this morning and couldn’t decide what kind I wanted…” Felicity shrugged, trying not to smile as she remembered leisurely taking out each box that morning and nibbling on dry cereal as she spoke with her mother on speaker phone.  “And it’s not _every_ box, just the _good_ ones.  So don’t worry, your precious Raisin Bran hasn’t gone stale.”

Felicity put on an innocent smile as she dropped her things on the floor and made her way around the counter to help Oliver clean up the mess.  As they stood shoulder to shoulder, Oliver proceeded to roll up and clip each bag of cereal before handing them to Felicity to rearrange back in the cabinet.  

“Thank goodness you found me, Felicity,” Oliver teased. “Not many people would put up with this behavior in a roommate.  Even if they _do_ pay most of the rent.”

Felicity waited for Oliver to look to her before dramatically rolling her eyes. “Says the man who makes enough noise to wake the dead at 5AM every morning, despite being able to move soundlessly at _any_ other time of day.”

“Do I need to remind you of 3AM last Tuesday when I woke up to you in the living room, with _every_ light on, cursing loudly at your computer?”

“I thought our stock prices were tanking in China! Plus, you can’t say _anything_ about talking.  I’m still waiting for you to make it through a single movie without talking through every important scene.  I don’t recall you doing that back when we were dating.”

“That’s because we never actually _made_ it through a movie when we were dating,” Oliver reminded her, his eyes flicking so quickly to her lips that Felicity almost missed the discrete movement.

But she didn’t.  She _couldn’t_.

These days it felt like she couldn’t ignore anything Oliver did.  His stolen glances here and there.  His hands lingering for a fraction of a second after handing her her mail.  The way he bit his lower lip every time she went off on one of her tangents and accidentally ended up making an inappropriate comment.  She had to believe these tiny changes were purposeful at this point.

At first, their arrangement worked far better than either of them had expected.  

After Darhk was defeated, Felicity had offered her spare room to Oliver, telling him it was ridiculous to risk staying in the bunker until all of their security measures were completely fixed, which could take weeks with their more limited budget. Oliver had resisted initially, promising he could afford a hotel, but Felicity insisted.  Though she wouldn't admit it aloud, after everything they had been through, everything they had _lost_ , she didn’t want to be alone.  She needed her best friend at her side.  And she suspected Oliver did too.

Surprisingly, it was almost _easy_ to be just friends in the beginning.  In addition to grieving their lost companions,  Oliver was preoccupied with learning how to lead the city without a mask and Felicity was spending her daylight hours fighting the board’s decision and ultimately being reinstated as CEO of Palmer Tech (thanks to a great deal of support from her very dedicated staff).  At night their hours were devoted to standing up for the citizens of Star City.  So, by the time they got back to the loft, Oliver and Felicity had plenty to talk about outside of their relationship before eventually retiring to their separate beds.

As time went on, they got increasingly comfortable living together again, but remained careful not to cross any lines.  Oliver could make Felicity dinner, but he wouldn’t serve it to her.  They could watch a movie on the couch together, but not share a blanket.  They could hug after a particularly stressful day, but never for more than five seconds.  Felicity even joked on a few occasions that they had friendship down to a science.  After so many years of back and forth, they had finally figured out how to be “just friends.”

But over the last two weeks, they had both started pushing their boundaries.  Oliver would waltz around the apartment without a shirt and Felicity would respond the next day by only putting on her robe, rather than pajamas, after her shower.  Felicity would let one too many innuendos slip as they chatted over dinner and Oliver would egg her on, seeing how much it took to make Felicity blush.  And in the end, the pair always laughed it off, acting like they had simply found a new comfort level in their friendship, that nothing remotely romantic was happening between them.  But every time, after they would separate in the evening, Felicity would lie awake, replaying the tiny moments in her mind and wondering if Oliver was also having trouble sleeping just down the hall.

But now she was so _sure_.  Felicity didn’t need words to know that Oliver felt the same longing that was tugging at her own heart.  That he too felt a shift in the air and saw the same hunger reflected in her eyes that she saw in his.

As Felicity and Oliver stood just inches apart in the kitchen, the familiar mixture of his sweat and cologne lingering between them, Felicity knew that if they were just going to laugh their flirting off this time, she had to step back _immediately_.  She’d have to turn this moment into a joke. Do something, say something, to alleviate the energy building between them.

But she didn’t know if she could physically tear herself away let alone think of anything funny to say. Felicity _had_ started to forget the effect Oliver’s scent had on her.  The way blood rushed to her cheeks and an overwhelming urge commanded every fiber of her being to draw closer to him, to bury her nose into the crook of his neck and let the smell intoxicate her.  She didn’t know how to escape its power over her.  

Nor was she sure she wanted to.

“You know…” Oliver said, his quiet words drawing Felicity another step closer so she could feel the heat radiating off his body just inches away. “I never properly thanked you for inviting me to stay here… And for not kicking me out, even after the bunker repairs were finished.”

“That’s kind of how we work, isn’t it?  No matter what, we still have each other.” An accidental laugh escaped Felicity’s lips. “Or sometimes we _only_ have each other.”

“Yeah…” Oliver looked away for a moment, scanning the entire room before finishing his thought, “I think that was the worst part of our break up?  I had always had you.  No matter what happened, how _terrible_ things had gotten, I never doubted having you at my side.  That was the first time, in a long time, that I felt like I was standing completely on my own.”

“I’m sorry-”

“No. No, don’t be sorry.   _Never_ be sorry, especially for that.” Oliver was quick to cut her apology off.  “I think we both needed time.  We had grown so much together that we weren’t sure what was _us_ and what was the relationship anymore.  I mean…” Oliver paused, his brow furrowing as he tried to put his feelings into his words. “I honestly didn’t know if I could be happy on my own…if I could be happy without you.  And your decision helped me to learn that I _could_ be.”

Felicity’s heart fell at Oliver confession but he caught her chin before she could look away.

“I _could_ be happy without you,” he continued.  “And honestly, I have to thank you for teaching me that.  But Felicity, I will _never_ be as happy as I was with you.  As I _am_ whenever I’m sharing my life with you. Platonically or not.”

Felicity pressed her lips together as Oliver released her chin, once again letting his hands fall to his sides.  

She too had found happiness _without_ him. She knew she could lead a complete and fulfilling life on her own.  Make friends.  Make a difference in the world. Maybe even care for someone else one day.  But she also knew that Oliver made her want to be better.  He made her want to not only be good enough for _him_ , but to be good enough for _herself_.  

“You know…” she stuttered with a forced laugh as she lifted her eyes to meet Oliver’s, “if someone were to walk in now, we’d have trouble convincing them we’re just roommates.  You know… two totally _platonic_ roommates.”

But Oliver didn’t match her laugh.  Rather, he licked his lips before tilting his head to meet her gaze and seriously whispering, “Yes... completely _platonic_.”

Felicity watched carefully as Oliver’s lips drew out every syllable of _platonic_ and suddenly she couldn’t remember why she had become so obsessed with that word over their past few weeks of living together.  Why, after months of working through their problems, growing as independent people, she had become so stubbornly convinced that they had to remain apart in order to retain their independent growth.  

“Oliver…” The familiar syllables slipped from Felicity’s lips as his hands tentatively moved to her waist, causing heat to radiate through her body. Oliver’s eyes closed upon hearing his name, a sigh escaping his lips as Felicity placed her hand behind his head, pulling him in.

Their lips met desperately, trying to make up for months of missed kisses, moving against one another with hurried gasps, nipping, sucking, _tasting,_ dancing just on the edge of pain as Oliver moved Felicity against the kitchen counter and tightened his grip on her waist.

As Oliver’s mouth moved to explore the curve of Felicity’s neck, she allowed her hands to rediscover the familiar terrain of his back and shoulders, grasping his shirt and desperately wishing there were any way to take it off him without making him take his lips away from her for a single moment.

“God, I’ve _missed_ you so much,” Oliver mumbled into her skin, his confession sending another chill through her body and causing her to dig her nails into his shoulder blades, in turn causing Oliver to let out a low moan.

“But… I’ve been _right_ here,” Felicity attempted to joke, unable to keep her voice light as she simultaneously tried to force air back into her lungs.

Oliver chuckled into Felicity’s shoulder, goosebumps appearing wherever his breath touched. “You _know_ what I mean.”

“I know…and I’ve missed you too.” Felicity gave herself a second to regain her train of thought before replying, “But... but, Oliver... is this a _good_ idea? Have we thought this through?”

Felicity had said those words purely out of obligation, assuming Oliver would just laugh her concern off, and go right back to kissing her, but her chest filled with fear when Oliver didn’t reply right away.  Suddenly she was terrified that he would step back and try to drag them back to the line they had sprinted across, hand in hand, just moments ago. Or, even worse… he would leave completely and draw a whole new set of lines that no longer allowed them to be friends.

But before she could think about how to distract him from his doubts, how to pull him back in, Oliver cupped her face in his hands and answered her with a definitive, “Yes.”

“Even though I’m so bad at being a _platonic_ roommate?” she asked, biting her lip as Oliver touched his forehead to her.

“Yes,” he answered again.

“And I do things like leave the cereal out just to get a reaction out of you?”

Oliver paused, pulling his head back to look at her with an amused smile.  “Well, _everyone_ has their faults I guess,” Oliver admitted after a moment, “But I’ll admit I’m pretty okay with not being platonic.   _Happy_ with it even.  And Felicity, if I’ve learned anything in these past few months, we _deserve_ to be happy. Both of us. _Together_.”

And Felicity knew, beyond any doubt, that he was right.  Because _that’s_ what Oliver did for her that no one else ever could.  He helped her to realize that she deserved to be happy, despite all the terrible things that had happened in her life. She deserved to want to expect the best from those around her.  And she knew she did the same for him.


End file.
